Tattoo
by DrillSargent87
Summary: Lily lets her ex-boyfriend know it is truly over. Then has to explain what it was all about to her current beau. Surprise at the end. Rated T, cause I don't want to teach little kids certain language.


**AN: I was listening to the radio when Tattoo by Jordan Sparks came on and I remembered that there was totally an L/J/SS story from it. So here is that story I've created.**

Tattoo by DrillSargent87

I got up on stage and started by saying to the audience, "This song has a special meaning to a special old friend of mine." With that I sent the cue to the DJ and stated singing the song.

_Hey... hey... hey... hey... (hey...) Ohhh... Ohhh Ohhh_

No matter what you say about love,  
I keep coming back for more,  
Keep my hand in the fire,  
Sooner or later I get what I'm asking for  
No matter what you say about life,  
I learn every time I bleed the truth is a  
Stranger soul is in danger  
I gotta let my spirit be free to...  
Admit that I'm wrong and then change my mind  
Sorry but I have to move on and leave you behind

(Chorus)  
I can't waste time so give it a moment  
I realize nothing's broken  
No need to worry bout everything I done  
Live every second like it was my last one  
Don't look back got a new direction  
I loved you once  
Needed protection  
You're still a part of everything I do  
You're on my heart just like a tattoo  
Just like a tattoo I'll always have you  
I'll always have you  
I'll always have you

I'm sick of playing all of these games  
It's not about taking sides  
When I looked in the mirror,  
It didn't deliver, it hurt enough to think that I could stop  
Admit that I'm wrong and then change my mind  
Sorry but I got to be strong and leave you behind

I can't waste time so give it a moment  
I realize nothing's broken no need to worry bout everything I done  
Live every second like it was my last one  
Don't look back got a new direction  
I love you once  
Needed protection  
You're still a part of everything I do  
You're on my heart just like a tattoo  
Just like a tattoo  
I'll always have you  
I'll always have you  
I'll always have you

If I live every moment,  
Won't change any moment,  
There's still a part of me in u  
I will never regret you  
Still the memory of you  
Marks everything I do.  
Oooh...

(Chorus) [2x]  
I can't waste time so give it a moment  
I realize nothing's broken no need to worry bout everything I done  
Live every second like it was my last one  
Don't look back got a new direction  
I loved you once  
Needed protection  
You're still a part of everything I do  
You're in my heart just like a tattoo

Just like a tattoo  
I'll Always have you...

I finished singing and looked out at the audience. The whole time I had searched for him, hoping he had heard me but all I found was my confused boyfriend. I couldn't find my secret ex. Oh well.

I left the stage and started off towards my room as Head Girl. I pushed though the crowd. When I reached the Entrance Hall, I saw him standing there. He stared at me with recognition, hurt, and understanding in his eyes.

"That was meant for me, wasn't it?" he questioned me, sounding more hurt then when his father abused him and came to me crying.

"Yeah. I'm really sorry, but I don't want to speak to you anymore, though you will always be apart of who I am," I sadly told him.

"Fine. Good bye … forever," he snarled as he spun around on his heal, cloak spinning, and stalked off towards the dungeon.

"Good bye," I managed to choke out before I dashed off to my room. Letting the tears flow once I reached my bed.

LATER

"Sweet, are you okay?" my boyfriend asked as he opened my door to see me finishing up my crying.

"Yeah," I sniffed, "it's just that … well … singing that was really hard for me to do."

"Was it meant for me?" he tentatively asked, dreading the possibility of me saying yes.

"Of course not. You mean way too much to me for me to sing that for you," I laughed out, wiping my tears off of my face.

"Good," he said, wiping imaginary sweat off his brow, "I was getting scared that you wanted to break up. I think it affected how well I played with the band."

"No, I was singing to my ex-best friend and ex-boyfriend. I knew that if I didn't tell him publicly he would still wish to correspond with me, but that would mean that I would sort of, maybe in some odd form, be cheating on you."

"Never, my Lily, flower," he allowed to slip past his lips as he wrapped me in his warm embrace. I leaned in to that embrace and we sat there until the sunlight started to fade. When my stomach started stating its opinion, we both laughed and headed down to dinner.

EVEN LATER

"James, I need to come clean about who the song really was for," I said that night after I had finished my homework and was ready for bed. James, my boyfriend and Head Boy, was sitting in front of our common room's fireplace, gazing at the dancing flames.

"Alright," he replied, turning to me and patting the space on the couch next to him. I sat down and snuggled into his side. After we were both comfortable I informed him who it was, "Snape."

"What do you mean 'Snape'?" James almost shoved me off of the couch when I said that.

"Well," I tried to calmly explain to him, "He's the one that the song was for."

"You mean that you used to go out with _him_?!?" James stage whispered to me.

"Yes. I met him before Hogwarts letters reached my house. We sort of lived in the same neighborhood," I start explaining the relationship I had with my ex and how I knew so much for a Muggle born when I started at Hogwarts, "One day I was at the playground with my older sister, Petunia, and we were playing on the swing. Our mother didn't come that time but I still jumped off the swing when I was at the highest. I loved the sensation of landing so effortlessly, it was so wonderful that I couldn't help it. After that Petunia made me stop on the swings. I went over to the bushes and picked up a flower that had fallen off. In my hand I made the flower open and close perfectly. Petunia started to freak out and demanded to know how I made the flower act like that. Then a skinny boy came out from behind the bushes. He wore jeans that were too short, a coat that was so large it looked like it probably had or did belong to a grown man, and his shirt was odd and smock like. His hair was black and very long, at least for a young boy. He told us that the reason was obvious. He told me he knew what I was and I so confused he had to explain. He told me that I was a witch and both Tuney and I became very offended. We started to walk off but he fallowed after us across the playground. He said his mother was a witch and he was a wizard. Just then, Petunia recognized who he was. She said he was the Snape boy who lived on Spinner's End by the river. She accused him of spying on us and he retorted that he wouldn't spy on her because she was a Muggle. After that she told me that we were leaving and we left.

"Later, he and I were sitting cross-legged under the trees next to the river on his street and he had just finished explaining many parts of the wizarding world to me. By this time he and I were friends. We'd been sitting there so long I stretched out on the grass. I inquired after what was going on at his house, if his parents were still fighting. I asked him to tell me about the dementors again. Then Petunia fell from behind a nearby tree, when Snape saw her there was a loud exchanging of words then a loud crack and a falling branch. I blamed him for it because it was obvious that he was angry at her.

"Between the time I got my letter and the time I first boarded the Hogwarts Express, he and I found that Tuney tried to get into Hogwarts by sending a letter but one day he and I found Dumbledor's response. She and I had a row at the station. When I saw him on the train you were there. I was crying in a corner of the compartment and Snape came in and talked with me, he and I had a small argument. He recovered by telling me that I had better be in Slytherin. You perked up and commented, and then Sirius chimed in with his comment. Which lead to Sirius and Snape in their first face off. I became angry and told Severus that we, him and I, should find anther compartment. That's when you and Sirius created Snape's nickname, 'Snivellus.'

"Over the next few years, you developed a romantic interest in me, which I pushed away, and he and I both developed other friends, but remained best friends. One day in our third year Snape and I had a row over who we were around during the day. He was around Avery and Mulciber and I hated what they did for 'a laugh' as Sev put it, though I knew it was Dark Magic. He brought up you and your friends, saying that you guys snuck out at night, that there was something weird with Remus. Sev had a theory that I knew word for word about Remus and him being ill every full moon. Sev was upset about when you saved his life when he fallowed you guys in to the Whomping Willow; he said that you were just saving yourself and your friends. He was also upset with how you so publicly showed me that you fancied me. He told me that you weren't just a big Quidditch hero like everyone else thought. I told him that I knew you were an arrogant toerag but that his so called friends had an evil idea of humor.

"I'll skip the rest of my arguments with him but later that year, right after out final exams, he asked me to go out with him when we returned home. I accepted and we went out for ice cream cones at a local Muggle shop. Then we returned to the river to watch the sunset. Some how we ended up holding hands; I think it was when he helped me stand up before he walked me home. When we reached my house there was this awkward silence before he quickly leaned in and gave me a quick kiss on the cheek, then dashed off in the direction of his house. I walked in through the door dreamily and my mother was up later that night to get the details, which I will spare you," I paused here for breath and to gauge James' reaction, "All summer long we spent time together. About a week after we got out of school he kissed me, I mean really kissed me. Not just an innocent peck, a full lipped warm, caring kiss. My first kiss. After that we were a couple but I couldn't tell my friends and he couldn't tell his because we knew that they would disapprove.

"And then came that fatal day, the day of our Defense Against the Dark Arts O.W.L. tests. I was out by the lake with my friends when I saw you cursing him for no apparent reason. I was so furious that I stormed over and told you to leave him alone. I asked you what he had done to you. You said that it was that it was because he existed. I was so angry that I was speaking coldly when I told you that you thought that you were funny but you were, and are I might add, an arrogant, bullying toerag."

"Hey, I'm not that way any more. I'm definitely better than I was then. I have you now," James interpreted me to defend himself with a wink. I slapped his shoulder and continued my explanation, "You tried to bribe me into going out with you yet again. You said that if I did you would never lay a wand on 'old Snivelly' again. I responded to that by saying 'I wouldn't go out with you if it was a choice between you and the giant squid.' It was after he recovered from the Impediment Jinx and cut a gash in the side of your face that you turned him upside down, hanging in the air. I told you to let him down and you dropped him. Sirius then used _locomoter mortis _on Sev and I got so angry I had taken out my wand. You muttered the counter curse telling him that he was lucky that I was there. Snape became angry and said he didn't need the help of a filthy Mudblood like me. I was so hurt that when I responded to that I put as much ice in my voice as possible. I told him that I wouldn't bother in the future and that if I were him I would wash my pants. You told him to apologize but I told you that you were just as bad as he was and that I didn't need you to make him apologize. I gave you perfect reasons on how you were just as bad as he was with out calling me a Mudblood, I also told you that you made me sick."

"You mean I don't make you sick anymore?"

"No. Now let me continue this explanation, I'm almost down."

"Alright. Continue, love," James said, relaxing back against the couch.

"Now where was I? Oh yes. I stalked away and ended up in the prefect's bathroom. I choose a stall and sat in there, crying my eyes out until Alice came and found me. She took me down to dinner. After I went up and got myself ready for bed. I had just put down my book when Mary came up and said that Snape was threatening to sleep outside of our portrait until I talked to him. I went down and spoke with him telling him that I wasn't interested in his apology and that he should save his breath. He said that 'Mudblood' had slipped out, that he hadn't meant to say it. I was furious. I told him that I had made excuses for him for years and that my friends didn't understand why I talked to him. I made mention of him and his 'precious little Death Eater friends' and he didn't even try to defend them. I told him that I couldn't pretend anymore; that he choose his way and I choose mine. He brought up the name he called me, 'Mudblood.' He said he hadn't meant to say it. I told him that he called everyone like me that name, why not me? I left him with that and went up to bed. He kept sending me owls. I ignored them all. I wrote one in return when he sent me a birthday gift. I sent back the gift unopened with a letter telling him that any relationship that had been between us was over, and that I wished him to stop communicating with me," I chocked back a sob and James' arms were instantly around me. When I had regained control of my emotions I continued, "I couldn't forget him, James. He was just so much of my past. I wrote this song one summer when Petunia said that she was glad I was acting like a normal person, to her that's saying that I was acting like a Muggle. When this talent show came I decided to sign up and sing it to him. You know the rest; except after I left he talked with me in the Great Hall. He knew that I had meant for him to get the meaning of the song that it was for him."

"So you had this whole other life before you went out with me?" James inquired after I had finished.

"Yeah, I felt that he would still write to me if I didn't publicly end what he and I had," I sighed.

**AN: I was going to end it here, but continued.**

"Lily?" James asked me. I felt a weight removed from the other end of the couch. I looked towards him and he was down on one knee, fumbling with something in his pockets. My eyes instantly teared up, thinking that he was about to propose.

"Lily, my love, I know that we haven't gone out for much over a year but I have loved you so much longer. I think that I fell in love with you that first day at Hogwarts when you showed so much feeling towards Snape, I believe that I instantly became jealous. I can tell that you love me too and I was wondering if you would do me the honors of becoming my wife?" With the last sentence he opened a ring box to reveal an emerald studded gold band with a diamond in the center. I let out a small cry and launched myself from the couch to throw my arms around his neck, tears streaming down my face. He was shocked and nearly dropped the box. I looked into his eyes and then leaned in and gave him a quick kiss.

"Forever and always," I grinned at him. He looked confused for a moment then it clicked that I meant yes. He took the ring from the box and slipped it on my finger. With that I knew my heart would never be broken again.

**AN: I know it seems to be a cliff-hanger but I couldn't help but add the proposal at the end. He had to seem worried when she sung the song because he was planning on proposing soon. When she spilled everything, he knew a better time wasn't available in the future so he asked her.**


End file.
